This is my handsome son! He's was birthed into our lives as a true miracle and yet I have never imagined feeling this overwhelmed about having a black son.
He was born January 12, 2020. Little did I know how 2020 would unfold. Everything that has happened in our lives has felt like a roller coaster ride. A pandemic erupts. The economy unstable. Social injustice becomes more vivid -- this is what I wish to write about in this post.
As a black woman, I am not naive about how my skin color makes certain people feel. Some people are impressed and attracted to me while others are disgusted and afraid. When I tell certain people that's I've worked for the same company for more than 15 years and been in the IT industry for over 13 years, I either get the 'you go girl' look or the 'really? but you're a black woman...' look. I make even more heads tilt and eyes open wide when I say I have a Bachelors and Masters -- both of which are in IT. Please know I am not bragging on myself nor am I seeking more accolades. I am just sharing my reality as a black woman.
Now, as a black mother, I am still not naive. Once I knew I was having a son, I immediately shifted my prayers to be more specific about what to teach him. If I was going to birth another girl (our first daughter was stillborn at 38.5 weeks -- our angel), I already knew what to teach her to a certain degree. However, for a son to develop into a strong intellectual black man, I had to ensure my prayers were specific. Why? Because I already knew what this society will try and do to him. In light of what is occurring now, I must admit I feel God heard my prayers.
I am a prayer warrior. I participate in the prayer ministry with my church. I do not believe my prayers go unheard. I do not find it ironic that such a shift is taking place in the world in 2020. My hope is in Jesus Christ alone. After all that has occurred due to the injustice of innocent black men and women from law enforcement, my hope is a little bigger that more of the world will pause and reflect before judging my son prematurely and inaccurately based on his skin color. That's one of the aspects of justice that we all want: just a fair chance at being considered equal. Being judged as someone who will and can be successful without breaking the law. Not every black person lied, cheated, or stole their way to having a nice home, car, great career. People have actually judged my husband (successful black man) about him driving a Cadillac Escalate -- believe it or not, my husband is not a drug dealer, drug user, and never stolen to get to the position he is in. His gifts made room for him and they always will. As my gifts will make room for me and always will. We, as a black community, desire for others to see and appreciate our gifts as we want to help the world by using those gifts.
As 2020 moves ahead, I continue to pray for my son and husband. I pray for the world as a whole. I pray we focus on what's more important in life. I pray that we all come together and unite in order to set the stage for a better future for all people. Black lives do matter and we just want to live in peace. No more hate. Just unconditional love. It won't happen overnight but it is possible because all things are possible with God!
Question: To the mothers of young black men -- how do you plan to ensure your son has a far opportunity in society?